Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
