i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
