Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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