I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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