I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
