bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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