When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Princesses don't give blow jobs
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize