i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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