I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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