The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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