are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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