question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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