with your own penis?
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
