So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize