I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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