Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
