remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
