Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
How many fucks given?
0.12846
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
