Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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