I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize