so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
