im gay
i know
yea but for you.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
