CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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