What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
3pm strippers are depressing
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
