Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
