Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I love having hate sex.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Randomize
