if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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