She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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