called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Randomize
