Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize