I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
you traded sex for a burrito?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
