Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Randomize
