Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
