Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
NoShamevember. You game?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Randomize
