but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
