what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
