We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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