i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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