i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
