I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
