I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Floor bacon is actually really good
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Shame is for Republicans.
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