Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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