tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
