i'm signing you up for texting rehab
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
