party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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