my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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