Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I'm sobbing to NWA
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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