I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
