I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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