Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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