yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Randomize